An Optimist at Heart
My recovery has proceeded slowly but surely over the last couple of months. Nothing terrible has happened to me in that time — and that’s good, considering increasing COVID–19 cases in New York. I continue to “mask up” and to do all that I am able to avoid catching The Virus. So have the vast majority of New Yorkers.
I am able to carry heavier loads around now. That has really made a difference — 25 pounds of groceries carried home last time I shopped and seven (count ‘em — seven!) dirty loads of laundry shlepped downstairs to the laundry room and then seven loads of clean clothes shlepped up the stairs. My legs were fine, but my chest muscles still needed some loving care and consideration, so I waited a couple of days to put half of them away... and slept in the interim.
As both my cardiologist and I say, “Listen to your body.”
Up until a couple of days ago, I was spinning on my bike at home to get some exercise, keeping my legs and my breathing in decent condition. On Christmas Day, I gave myself a nice gift: I took my bicycle outside and rode a few miles. That felt soooo good! Now, today, I rode 11.6 miles, wearing my heart monitor. Gobsmacking good!! It was interesting to see how my heart rate varied throughout my ride. Good to see that my heart rate slowed by 20 beats per minute in only a short time when I was stopped at a traffic signal. My breathing never got labored. Only a little of “the burn” in my legs and no tiredness after riding. No chest pain. No heart pain. But I couldn’t really put out; that will have to wait until sometime in the New Year when I can allow my heart to beat as fast as it wants — within reason.
As it has been said: “Listen to your body” — with the aid of electronic devices...!
I’m hopeful. I wonder how much faster I can ride. I want to be able to attack hills more aggressively. I would like to do another Escape New York! century ride (100 miles) this September — and faster than I did a couple of years ago. I wish to take a few more long bike trips — well before I get too old to do so. Knowing more about my body, what stresses it out, and how well it can recover from that stress with the right care will inform me how far I can go, how fast, and how long.
I say it again:
Listen to your Body!
It would have been nice not to have followed in some respects a relatively unhealthy lifestyle for a number of years, driven by mental disorder. It would have been nice to not have had to take for seven years a medication that probably deposited a good deal of the plaque that clogged my left coronary artery. To be sure, I couldn’t dodge the fact that there was coronary disease in my family tree. But regret will only slow me down and, even though it has been difficult in the past for me to shake off a regret-driven depression inducing state of mind, I will surely be able to live more fully in the future, knowing that health professionals and I have teamed together to give me a good chance of achieving a number of my desired goals before I’m done with this world. What those goals are is still in the process of being reckoned — but at least I have the cycling part of it outlined!
Oh — well... then there’s music. I’m so psyched about having found the more athletic side of myself that I think less about making music. I’ve not touched a keyboard but a few times since around Ides of March time, when the church I was working for closed and musical performance in New York all but disappeared. But I kept on cycling. Then came July and my coronary artery disease diagnosis, and I became intensely focused on getting my heart fixed. But I still kept cycling, including to most all of my pre-surgery appointments!
I don’t doubt that the exercise provided by my avid habit helped keep me in a good state of mind, as well as in good fitness to handle the rigor of major surgery. Listening to my body and mind has done me good.
It’s much more difficult right now for musicians to express their artistry, except in the privacy of their homes or in an empty building. However, now that I’m able to get around, carry heavier loads, sleep less(!), and commute by bicycle(!!!), I have the bandwidth to add music practice to my To Do list. By May, I could be playing organ and directing a choir again and maybe even planning a concert or two. I look forward to that; the increased music making will help me achieve an even more healthy state of mind.
Both music and exercise are healing activities, and I intend to continue doing both. Then there’s good food. Drawback: I’ve gained 20 pounds this year — most of it from my own cooking!
I feel good about what’s to come just around the corner — many challenges, but also much satisfaction (as long as I listen to my Spirit... and my body). I’m thankful to all who have stayed in touch, seen me through surgery, and offered me emotional and material support during my recovery. In that spirit, I sincerely wish all of you Peace and Fulfillment in the coming year.
Have a Happy New Year!
Mark Victor
